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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26315803">Taken by the River</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dynellin/pseuds/Dynellin'>Dynellin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hunter X Hunter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Action/Adventure, Angst, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Isekai, OC, OC insert, Original Character(s), POV Original Female Character, Self-Insert, Sioc, Slow Build, Transmigration, i know it's cliche but let me have my fun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:14:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,148</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26315803</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dynellin/pseuds/Dynellin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>She was lost. Suffering. Struggling. Only a high school girl thrown into a situation she wished for but never wanted. Erin had managed to find herself in the Hunter X Hunter world with no clue how to get home. With her options considered, her purpose was clear: care for the boys. Protect them. And if she could, enjoy what little life would consequently remain.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Goodbye, Pompadour</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was a rush of steps upstairs and a loud thud.</p><p>“Erin, pop the toaster, quick! I forgot I’d put it in a second round!”</p><p>“Got it, mum.” Reluctantly leaving my bowl of cereal, I strolled into the kitchen and pressed the eject button on the toaster.</p><p>Thoroughly burnt.</p><p>I gingerly took the charcoaled bread out of the toaster and placed it on a plate, shaking my hand and blowing on my fingers to ease the pain.</p><p>*BEEP BEEP BEEP*</p><p>“You’ve gotta be kidding me…” Lauren sighed deeply, shooting a fierce gaze towards the kitchen ceiling as she shoved an angry spoonful of cereal in her mouth.</p><p>“Aaaaand there it goes again. We may as well just remove it,” Nathan grumbled, none too happy about the loud incessant beeping.</p><p>The sound of a door opening was followed by footsteps and dad’s head popping around the corner. “Sandy?”</p><p>“You know it,” I responded with a bit of cheek. Dad just shook his head with a small chuckle.</p><p>“Either that alarm goes or my sanity does,” Lauren spat, gesturing with her spoon towards dad.</p><p>“You know we can’t do that. I mean, it may only be a required safety measure to make it less likely that you’ll die in the case of a fire, but it’s still important.”</p><p>“Well, if we can’t scrap it, maybe we should name it, seeing as it’s pretty much part of the family at this point,” Nathan suggested, eyes focussed on his bowl while he scraped up the last dregs of his breakfast. “It might also make it more of a joke and less of an obnoxious bastard.”</p><p>I raised an eyebrow with a smirk, walking to the bench to grab a tea towel so I could fan the smoke away from our loudest family member.</p><p>“Just make sure the name isn’t boring. It needs to be something funny or stupid.” Lauren immediately turned her head sharply towards our dad with a fierce look. “But when I say stupid, I don’t mean something like ‘Beeper’. Yea, it’s stupid, but it ain’t funny or good. Rejected.”</p><p>The words forming on his lips died as his face fell.</p><p>My persistent fanning finally shut the damn thing up so I could return to my cereal. It was as I anticipated, though. Soggy. However, I wasn’t about to go wasting perfectly edible food, plus I was hungry and couldn’t wait until something else had been fixed up.</p><p>“What about Bl-“</p><p>“Shut up, dad. I don’t trust your suggestions.”</p><p>He wilted under Lauren’s harsh glare, choosing to remain quiet for fear of her verbal abuse.</p><p>“Eugene?” I mumbled out half-heartedly around the cereal mush in my mouth.</p><p>“No, boring.”</p><p>“What about Pompadour?”</p><p>Everyone looked at Nathan with a stupid look on their faces. “…what the fuck?” Lauren blurted out.</p><p>“Lauren, language.” Dad exchanged a stern glance with her before turning back to Nathan. “But seriously, what the fuck?”</p><p>“I mean, it fits my requirements I guess, but still, what?”</p><p>Nate shrugged his shoulders, spoon clanging against his empty bowl as he pushed it away from himself slightly. “Well, I was just thinking that if we’re personifying it, it would be a pompous person that likes listening to their own voice. And then building off ‘pompous’ to make it weirder and more abstract, you end up with ‘pompadour’.”</p><p>“Oh, fine brother of mine,” Lauren purred as she leaned closer to him, placing a heavy hand on his shoulder, “I like how you think. Approved.”</p><p>Nodding his head, dad added, “Now all we need is to buy some googly eyes, a moustache and one of those ‘Hi my name is’ name tags and it’ll be perfect.”</p><p>“Uh, you do know you’re not meant to put anything, even paint, on the fire alarm, right?” I reminded with a smirk.</p><p>“Psh, whatever. It’ll be fine as long as we don’t cover up anything important.”</p><p>I giggled, unable to hold in my laughter after thinking about how crazy we’re going to look when we have visitors and they see we put eyes, a moustache and a name tag on our fire alarm. “I guess we’ll have a great conversation starter then for when people visit.”</p><p>Thudding was heard once more as mum raced down the stairs.</p><p>“Sandy, you did it again,” dad commented as she raced past him.</p><p>“Oh shhh. Now, what’s the damage?” She stopped in front of the toast sitting on the bench and visibly drooped. “Ah. That’s the damage.”</p><p>“See, mum. This is why you don’t put your toast on, particularly on the second time round, and then just go to ‘fix up your hair’. It hasn’t worked yet and won’t work in the future,” I reprimanded her over my shoulder, still intently eating my breakfast.</p><p>Mum was by the sink, scraping off the burnt bits with a knife. Her face morphed from a frown to a pout, then resignation was clear.</p><p>“I know, sweetie, but I always think I have time. ‘Cause what else am I going to do while I’m waiting for the toast to pop? I can’t just stand there!” With her sad attempt at toast in hand, she walked to the back door. Opening it, she took a step out. “Here you go, birdies. Enjoy,” she said as she frisbeed the toast onto the lawn.</p><p>Lauren chuckled, collecting her and Nathan’s bowls and heading to the kitchen. “You’ll never learn, will you, mum?”</p><p>Mum smiled back sweetly with a bit of cheekiness in her eyes. “You know it, hun. One day, I swear. I will make it in time one day.”</p><p>“Okay, that’s great mum, but could you please finish getting ready so we can leave? We do have school to get to,” Nathan retorted.</p><p>“I still have time, though.” She looked at the clock. “…Okay, I have less time than I realised. Peter, dear, could you pack the kids and myself some lunch boxes while I finish getting ready?”</p><p>Before she could finish, dad was already in the kitchen getting out three containers to put some food in.</p><p>Finishing up my breakfast, I ventured upstairs to brush my teeth, check over my hair and uniform and pack my school bag. I hauled it back downstairs, feeling very much like a pack horse with how heavy all the bloody textbooks were, nabbing my freshly packed lunch from the kitchen bench.</p><p>“C’mon Nate, you packed and ready?” I asked as I stuffed the container into the only space left inside my bag.</p><p>He sidled up beside me, grabbing his own lunch before walking out of the kitchen and towards the stairs. “On it right now, Erin. I’m no issue. Mum on the other hand…” Nathan trailed off.</p><p>“I know, I know. Just at least let me eat this banana for now, then I’ll brush my teeth and be good to go,” Mum whined out.</p><p>“Then we’ll be in the car, mum. I’ll start tooting if you take too long,” I semi-threatened with a grin. “See you later, Lauren.”</p><p>“Later, Erin. Enjoy school,” Lauren called over her shoulder from her newly camped position on the couch with a chuckle.</p><p>As I walked past the study door, I poked my head in and said bye to dad who was busy on the computer.</p><p>“We’re leaving now, dad.”</p><p>“See you later, sweetie.”</p><p>Nathan had unlocked the door and yelled a loud goodbye into the house before exiting. I followed, closely in tow as we ventured to the garage. The boot opened and in went his bags with little regard for their contents. I placed mine a little more carefully, hoping to minimise the damage to my books. I didn’t like them and wanted to burn some, but I could still get some money back from them.</p><p>Nathan picked his usual position of shotgun, so I clambered into the back seat. As I adjusted my dress underneath the seatbelt, the driver side door opened. Mum threw her bag at me, getting me to put it on the floor of the back seat for her.</p><p>“You did lock the doors, didn’t you, mum?” Nathan asked as she put the key in the ignition.</p><p>“Yes, I di- Actually, I don’t remember whether that was today or yesterday I remember doing that. Hahhh, guess I better go check.” Defeated, she removed the keys from the car and went to check the doors.</p><p>Moments later, she returned to the car, landing heavily in her seat.</p><p>“So-“</p><p>“No, they weren’t locked,” she said with a pout.<br/><br/></p><hr/><p><br/>One car karaoke session later and we had arrived at school. Nathan and I hopped out and went round to the boot.</p><p>“Mum,” Nate called out.</p><p>“Gotcha.”</p><p>The pop of the boot signalled it was open. Nathan grabbed his bag first, hauling it on his back and almost toppling himself in the process with the combined force of the momentum and weight.</p><p>“I wish the text books weren’t so heavy,” Nathan complained.</p><p>I chuckled. “Welp, sorry to say but it doesn’t get better as the years pass.”</p><p>He sighed heavily, picked up his other bag and slung it on his shoulder, seeming a bit unbalanced and side-heavy now.</p><p>I watched on as he said his goodbyes to mum, going to the passenger door, opening it up and squishing in to let her give him a kiss on the cheek. He may be a cynic and sometimes sound a bit bitter, but he loves his family and would occasionally indulge mum like this.</p><p>“See you laters, alligators,” mum chirped out in a cheery tone while I collected my bag from the boot and Nate retreated from the passenger seat.</p><p>Deciding to play along, I responded with a sing-song, “In a while, crocodile.” I couldn’t really see her face from where I was at the back of the car, but I could tell she was smiling from how her cheeks had puffed up.</p><p>With the boot being slammed shut, she knew we were finished in the car, waiting a few seconds for us to get on the footpath first before pulling out and speeding off.</p><p>I followed after Nate, a few steps behind him as we walked into the school grounds. Students of all ages mingled about around us, most chatting away happily, while a couple of the year 7 kids ran around playing some game. What energy they had. They didn’t yet know the pain of finals.</p><p>We quickly arrived at the courtyard, needing to split ways to get to our separate year levels’ classrooms.</p><p>Nathan had already begun going off to his classroom, so I called out after him, “See ya, Nate.”</p><p>“Later, Erin,” he returned, a wave over his shoulder as he walked away.</p><p>I found my friends and we chatted for a bit just about this and that, cut off by the bell ringing too soon. The school day that came after drawled on just like usual. Some talk of assessments that were upcoming, obviously all being in the same week as was organised by the teachers of every single damn subject. Not going over or checking homework that was supposed to be due today. Feeling sleepy from all the information I had to sit down and listen to.</p><p>And just like that, the school day was over. Nathan had football training at the nearby oval tonight so was coming home later, being picked up by mum on her way home from work.</p><p>Quickly stuffing the books in my locker into my bag, I speed walked to the bus stop in hopes of getting there early enough to be able to fit on the first one that came. Arriving seemingly early enough, I whipped out my iPod and stuck the ear buds in, listening to some music to pass the time and feel less awkward while standing in the approximate line that had developed.</p><p>A song and a bit later, the bus showed up and it was a shove fest as usual, barely managing to hold my bus pass against the scanner long enough for it to register because of the pushing I was getting from some annoying year 7 kids. A bit peeved by their rudeness, I was already in a state of not wanting to be on this bus anymore, but I was not walking all that way home. I just had to tough out the noise and crowd until my stop, then I could be home in the peace and quiet.<br/><br/></p><hr/><p><br/>The cool breeze outside was almost heavenly, especially when compared to the warm, humid air of the sardine tin on wheels. The stroll home was nice, doing a bit of head bopping and shoulder moving to the music, but it would have been so much nicer if I didn’t have to carry all those textbooks.</p><p>Unlocking the door, I walked in and immediately plopped my bag down inside it.</p><p>“I’m home,” I called out, not really knowing whether anyone was home.</p><p>Turns out, no one was. Lauren left a note saying she was at uni doing some work for a group assignment and to still make dinner for her. Dad added a little footnote to this.</p><p>“Gone out to grab some things ;)<br/>Dad.”</p><p>Seems he wanted us to look crazy as quick as possible.</p><p>I grabbed my bag and dragged it upstairs, unpacking it in my room. Wanting to be freed immediately from the horrid sack, I took off my school dress and traded it for a pair of blue jeans, a black graphic t-shirt and my favourite black sneakers. Has my wardrobe and like for the colour black been somewhat influenced by my sister? Probably.</p><p>I shoved my wallet, keys, phone and bus pass into the closest bag at hand, having decided I was going to the shops to grab something to cook for dinner.</p><p>Going back downstairs, I had a glass of water and a snack to tide me over for the time being. While munching away, I also grabbed a couple of shopping bags which I folded and put in my own bag.</p><p>As I went to unlock the door, my mouth opened, about to say goodbye to everyone in the house, but it stopped short. Instead, with a smile firmly carved into my face, I turned back to face the interior of the house and called out, “Goodbye, Pompadour. Don’t make any trouble while I’m out.”<br/><br/></p><hr/><p><br/>Bypassing all the retail stores, I went into the nearest supermarket, bee-lining towards the meat section to see what was on sale. I saw some beef mince that was discounted and decided to get that, suddenly really feeling spaghetti bolognese for dinner. Going back to the fresh produce I passed by earlier, I grabbed some carrots, a zucchini, mushrooms and an onion before moving on to the isle with pasta sauce. On my way out, I passed the chocolate isle, sneaking a glance in.</p><p>“It should be okay to just grab one…”</p><p>I went and grabbed a chocolate bar before heading to the checkout, sneaking it past my logical self.</p><p>Shopping bag full, I walked back into the main walkways of the shopping centre. I observed the nearby food places to see if I wanted to grab something to eat before I headed home, and let’s be real, that’s absolutely what I was going to do. Seeing a sushi place, my stomach decided it wanted something from there, feet moving as my stomach commanded.</p><p>*thump*</p><p>My bag dropped.</p><p><em>I’m sorry, you what mate?</em> Good thing I noticed, or I would have lost a bunch of money as well as my easy way home.</p><p>I leaned down and grabbed it, standing back up to place it on my shoulder when my hand just let it go.</p><p>“Oh, come on, hand. You’re really gonna do me like this?”</p><p>I leaned down to pick it up again when everything spun. I landed on my knees, one hand gripping my bag handle, the other holding my head. First it was light-headedness and dizziness, then it changed to heavy-headedness and intense pressure. My brain throbbed in my skull, dulling the sounds around me, blurring the images in front of me.</p><p>Feet passed by. All kinds of shoes. None stopped. They just kept walking.</p><p>Breathing intensified, my body trembled. My very bones shook within me, almost vibrating. The heat evolved, hotter and hotter, sweatier and sweatier. I felt about ready to burst, and wouldn’t I relish it. Much more than this humiliation on this grotty floor.</p><p>I jumped, tense from the cold hand that suddenly landed on my shoulder.</p><p>Muffled mumbling reached my ears. They were probably saying something to me, but I couldn’t make anything out. I didn’t want to bother this person, so I just waved them off slightly and tried to stand up. Didn’t work.</p><p>My sad effort just ended with me even further on the ground, face first surrounded by my scattered belongings and groceries.</p><p>The hand was back, still cold on my shoulder. There was mumbling once more, but one part I could just make out.</p><p>“Are you alright?”</p><p>Wanting to respond to try and ease their worries, I weakly opened my mouth and responded.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>I immediately began to feel weaker, the energy required to speak apparently being a massive toll on my body currently, but I still felt the need to speak to this person.</p><p>“I’ll be… just fine.”</p><p>And then I was out. I couldn’t feel or hear anything. The shoes were gone, the cold hand was gone, the murmurs were gone, the grimy floor was gone. All that remained was a continuous echo of what that person asked me.</p><p>Again and again, it echoed in my head. I’d never fainted before, so was this what it was like to faint?</p><p>The echoing dulled and loudened, dulled and loudened, crescendoing to a dramatic skull-splitting finale before stopping dead.</p><p>I saw light through my eyelids and my body tingled with the warmth of the sun. Slowly opening my eyes, I was met with a far too bright, blue sky.</p><p>“Are you alright?”</p><p>I turned my head to the side to see a lady standing there, looming over me. She was a kind looking older woman, a head of grey hair surrounding her currently concerned face.</p><p>She must have been the person who put their hand on my shoulder.</p><p>Propping myself up on my elbows, I smiled meekly and replied. “Yes, I’m alright. Thank you for your concern, but I’ll be fine now.”</p><p>Her faced remained set in its expression. “Are you sure, dear? I can’t exactly carry you anywhere, but I could at least get you help.”</p><p>“No no, that’s quite alright. Just your concern and kindness are enough.” I smiled back more warmly this time.</p><p>She looked like she wished to protest, but simply sighed. “If you insist, dear. You go home right now, though, and get some food in you before having a good long rest. It wouldn’t do for a young lady such as yourself to go passing out on the street again.”</p><p>“I do insist. Thank you.”</p><p>The lady reluctantly stepped back before slowly turning around and walking away, glancing back every so often. I just waved her off as she walked down the street away from me.</p><p>Looking around, I suddenly processed a couple of the things she’d just said.</p><p>
  <em>…the street? Wait, why would I be in the street? Wouldn’t they take me to a sick bay area or something? And hasn’t she already gotten me help? She must have if I’m no longer inside the shopping centre.</em>
</p><p>I was honestly just a bit flustered, trying to piece some things together. Why the street? Where are my bags?</p><p>“…Where am I?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Wow, I can’t believe that this finally exists. This has been in my brain for aaaaages (like with every single other fic idea I have…), but I finally got the motivation to write. Don’t know what the updates will be like for this, we’ll both have to find out how often they happen. Anyways, hope you enjoyed this little intro before we get into the real meat of the story.</p><p>Do note this chapter was posted on FanFiction.net some time ago. I am just now cross-posting the chapters across to AO3. I will likely be uploading the rest of the chapters over the course of the next few weeks. (There's not many so far though so it won't take long to do...)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Trash Blanket</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I gingerly began to sit up, taking it slowly so I didn’t encourage the return of whatever happened to my body earlier. Eyes wide, I turned my head, looking in all directions. Nothing was familiar. Everything around me was foreign. My breathing began to intensify, coming in shorter, sharper gasps. My head began to whip around, more and more violent. My eyes couldn’t manage to focus on anything and that headache from earlier was starting to come back with a vengeance, pounding and pounding.</p>
<p>Then I made eye contact.</p>
<p>My breath caught. Someone was walking past, watching me with judgemental eyes. I then noticed the various other glances I was getting from passers-by. With each person I noticed watching me, my face got hotter till it was practically burning. My head shot down, breaking all eye contact and preventing any more. I was living one of my worst nightmares. I needed to get all this attention off me.</p>
<p>Releasing the breath I’d been holding, I decided I had to get up and away from the centre of the road. That was the easiest way to make myself less attention grabbing and more innocuous. Resolving myself, with a deep breath in, I stood up. My legs trembled slightly, mimicking my stomach, but I pushed forward with my head down, pointedly making sure I did not make eye contact anymore.</p>
<p>Stumbling to the side of the road, I shuffled along the building fronts until I found a little alleyway I could fit down that wasn’t filled to the brim with trash. Planting myself next to the least offensive bags of rubbish, I curled in on myself. Arms around my knees, I sunk my head into the crook of my legs and blocked myself off from the outside world. My warm, moist breath was the only thing I smelled, felt, breathed.</p>
<p>There, in a place where the battle between my instincts to panic and my analytical side to remain calm had reached an impasse, that is where I reached a dazed state that was almost meditative, almost delusional, not quite conscious. I stayed there. Don’t know how long. Could’ve been seconds. Could’ve been minutes. I stayed. To try and calm. Contemplate. Reach a state where I could think. No longer feel like I need to eject my innards and rid my body of all moisture by way of tears.</p>
<p><em>It’s different. I don’t</em> know<em> this place. I’ve never- Never been here. It’s just… I… Th-… Where on Earth am I? Why, no, what? I can’t. This... <strong>Why?</strong></em></p>
<p>Darkness and colours swirled, light pulsated and shrank in little rings like going through a tunnel backwards. Little sparkles appeared around the edge of my vision, and at this, I began to feel my body relax. This was familiar. This sight. The appearance when I closed my eyes was still the same as ever. Not everything was different.</p>
<p>My stomach began to calm, as did my thoughts. I clung to that one familiar thing like a lifeline in turbulent waters. It wasn’t much, or really even anything that one would normally feel relieved about, but if it was something that I could steady myself with, then I’ll damn well take whatever I can get no matter how silly. If my brain says this is good, then it’s good.</p>
<p>Suddenly my entire body sprung open and tensed at the intrusion of a loud thud. A new bag of rubbish had joined me in the alleyway. Poking my head up over the bags around me, I looked further into the alley to see a man’s back retreat into a side door for one of the buildings. I blinked, still in a bit of shock at the rude awakening from my trance, yet almost thankful for the wake-up call.</p>
<p>This was still a society. There were people and shops and jobs. That was also the same. Another thing.</p>
<p>It wasn’t all necessarily “completely foreign.” Just not exactly the same as what I knew.</p>
<p>I took solace in that.</p>
<p>Having been calmed by these pieces of driftwood, these life rafts in the ocean, I began to organise my thoughts.</p>
<p>
  <em>Is it reasonable to be panicked? Abso-fucking-lutely. Do I have the time and energy to waste wallowing in this now? No. Not now. Later. Off to the side.</em>
</p>
<p>I whisked the thoughts of distress and panic to the very depth of my brain, moving them out of the forefront with a sideways push of my hand. A deep breath in, I slapped my thighs twice, brought my hands up in fists, and with a deep breath out, released the fists in a slow sweeping movement away from my body. To finally rid myself of the unproductive emotions and thoughts, I shook my body from head to toe.</p>
<p>
  <em>Okey. Dokey. Let’s get it.</em>
</p>
<p>I glanced around once more, deciding to make a little fort-like thing of the rubbish bags for me to contemplate in without worry of watchful and judgemental eyes. I stacked them up two-high either side of me, with single bags on the ground in front to fence my cross-legged self in.</p>
<p>
  <em>First point of contention: where the fuck is this?</em>
</p>
<p>From the very narrow bit of the place I saw out the entrance of the alley, it definitely wasn’t anywhere I recognised. The buildings weren’t quite like what is usually around the area I live, but they weren’t necessarily that crazy ridiculously different. Sort of a bit of an older look? More European? Or not. Maybe it’s just one of the places that was built up a while ago, like those suburbs closer to the city, so they have older buildings.</p>
<p>
  <em>That isn’t truly too big of a matter, though. I’m still in a place where I can communicate with people so I can just ask for any of that information I need. Now secondly, and more importantly, how did I get here?</em>
</p>
<p>Kidnapping was definitely the first thing that came to mind. But if I was kidnapped, then why would they just drop me in the middle of a random street and leave me there? It doesn’t make any sense. I’d mentally almost crossed that option off my list entirely.</p>
<p>I had no blindfold, no gag, no restraints of any sort on me (rope or otherwise), so there was no way I was kidnapped and accidentally dropped here in the process of my translocation. There was no dull feeling of having recently had something tied around my body, so it wasn’t likely I’d been kidnapped and released here for some reason. Even the stupidest kidnapper would want to make sure their charge was restrained in the event they woke up before they reached their destination and tried to escape.</p>
<p>There was the possibility that this was a prank that’s gone a step too far, but who the fuck would see a person who’s just passed out for reasons unknown and think “this is a great opportunity to fuck with them.”</p>
<p>
  <em>If this really was a prank, I might murder the person who orchestrated the whole thing.</em>
</p>
<p>Once again, though, I had almost entirely crossed this off the list of possibilities purely because it seemed far too outlandish. Some pranks take things too far, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone transport a person who’s unexpectedly fainted or passed out for the sake of their prank.</p>
<p>Maybe amnesia induced by the headache? That seemed a bit out there to just lose your memory from a headache that wasn’t even head trauma-induced, but I guess still a possibility. I ain’t no med student so don’t know for certain, but I feel like intense pain could potentially have that effect.</p>
<p>The only other possibility I could think of was that I was dreaming. Lucid dreaming, specifically. Everything was from my perspective and too cohesive and clear for it to be a normal dream. Plus, I was consciously controlling things within the dream and sensations were very clear.</p>
<p>
  <em>I mean, there’s also sleep walking, but I’ve not been known to do that before so don’t think that’s really an option to consider.</em>
</p>
<p>So, from that deduction, I’m probably dreaming. It doesn’t really make sense, but it makes the most sense of the options available to explain my current predicament.</p>
<p>
  <em>It truly is odd how vivid every sensation is, though. I’ve felt sensations within dreams before, but never with the crispness and abundance that is present here. I’ve never had a lucid dream before so have no point of reference on that front, but maybe that’s at least how my brain is?</em>
</p>
<p>Thinking about that anymore will get me nowhere. Let’s just decide to assume that this is a dream but treat it like the amnesia scenario just in case it isn’t. I don’t feel like making a fool of myself anymore today.</p>
<p>
  <em>Okay, next then. What do I do now? I guess I should just… explore and look around? Attempt to gather some information? If this is a dream, I could use the weird shit my brain comes up with to create a setting for a story or something. ‘Cause we know the weird shit my brain do can be very fascinating at times. And then if this is in fact the amnesia scenario, the information gathered through exploration will help me get home.</em>
</p>
<p>I think I’ll just have to take it as it comes. It’s not like I can really plan things out with the current situation. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know how I got here. I don’t know if this is a dream or not.</p>
<p>I just have to wing it.<br/><br/></p>
<hr/>
<p><br/>I had walked around town for a few hours, making sure to be extra aware of the turns I made in case I needed to return to the location I woke up in. I don’t know why I might need to do that, but I still made sure to be attentive to that on the off chance it became important.</p>
<p>The buildings definitely gave me a slightly more European vibe overall, yet looking up over the rooftops, I could see buildings much more reminiscent of skyscrapers. It felt a bit odd to see those more modern towering shapes in this port town where among the newer motorised boats, classic old wooden sailing ships docked. I glanced one such ship come to port earlier and watched in fascination as the sailors disembarked.</p>
<p>The men were all dressed in typical fictional sailor get-up with bandanas and ascots. They unloaded massive wooden crates and barrels as a gruff older man, undoubtedly the captain, barked orders at them, puffing on a pipe all the while. A younger man stood next to him, seemingly the second-in-command, marking things off on a clipboard and occasionally mentioning something to the captain.</p>
<p>They hastily unloaded all the cargo and upon confirmation from the captain and newly arrived client, the sailors hurried off with a cheer, likely on their way to get plastered at a local bar. It felt like I was watching a fantasy show.</p>
<p>I’d entered some local stores earlier, perusing the available wares. The more knick-knack and souvenir-centred stores held a lot of nautical-themed products. Ships in bottles, anchor paperweights, imitation sailor hats and bandanas. The classic collector’s spoon. I felt bad entering these stores and giving the employees hopes of a sale when, in fact, I had no money on me, but I was too curious not to enter and have a look around.</p>
<p>I’d also snuck a peak in the window of a café down one of the many streets. It was a quaint and homely little mum and pap’s shop. I had chanced a look at the signboard out front featuring their opening times and daily specials, and it seemed apple tart was their most famous dish.</p>
<p>At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what it said. It wasn’t actually written in English.</p>
<p>It was written in some language I did not know, yet I could inherently understand what it said. Like a language I never knew that I knew. It was the same with the spoken words. It was not English, yet I could speak it. I heard it and my brain understood, verbally responding in kind. I guess that’s a feature of this dream world.</p>
<p>The sun was now beginning to set, blessing everything in a beautiful golden-orange glow. It truly was a beautiful town. The reflection off the water of the vibrant sky and burning sun was exquisite. Silhouettes of ships were darkened by the brightly shining light from the horizon, creating a stunning stark contrast, almost seeming like a shadow puppetry performance of ‘an evening in the harbour.’</p>
<p>The foot traffic changed with the setting sun, reducing around the shopping districts. Instead, bars and restaurants were bustling with rowdy patrons, abuzz with excitement for the night ahead. The smells of various foods wafted through the air tantalisingly, enticing hungry wanderers to enter and engorge themselves.</p>
<p>I found myself drifting closer to these establishments until my brain kicked in, reminding me of my lack of money.</p>
<p>I then found myself puzzled.</p>
<p>It wasn’t simply the delicious smells and promise of yummy food that made me want to eat. I was actually hungry. I could feel my tummy rumble and growl like a chained beast waiting to be fed.</p>
<p>Just as before, though, I still had no money. No money meant no food. And seeing as I decided to treat this as if it weren’t a dream world on the off chance it wasn’t, there’s no way I was going to risk stealing in this new place. So hungry I stayed.<br/><br/></p>
<hr/>
<p><br/>The sun had properly, well and truly disappeared below the horizon, covering everything in darkness. The streetlamps lit along the piers, some more dispersed ones lining the inner streets accompanied by wall lamps.</p>
<p>My stomach had not settled like the sun had. It grew more and more impatient for input, but I had nothing to give. I was also really starting to feel the bite of the chilly ocean wind. My jeans and t-shirt weren’t gonna cut it if I wanted to stay warm, but once again: no money.</p>
<p>It was starting to sink in that it was night-time. I was hungry and cold and tired. And I had nowhere to sleep.</p>
<p>Wait… I had nowhere to sleep. I didn’t have a home or a room or any form of shelter that existed in this town.</p>
<p>…How was I going to survive?</p>
<p>All the inns would probably be full or not open for check-in this late (plus I don’t have a wallet). I needed food (but I don’t have a wallet). I needed a jacket for warmth (but no wallet to purchase it).</p>
<p>I wandered mindlessly, unsure really of what to do next or where to go. I couldn’t browse any shops because they had shut hours ago, but I didn’t have a home to return to. I could look out at the water, but with no jacket to keep me warm? I’d freeze.</p>
<p>With no other destinations in mind, I returned to where I found myself earlier in the day. The street was empty, the watchful eyes from before all cosied up in their abodes. I walked to the middle of the street and stared at the ground, long and hard, examining each and every speck of the paved street I could see in the dim light.</p>
<p>Slowly lowering myself, I lay just as I had prior. On my back, in the middle of the road, I gazed at the stars. The section of sky I could see was framed by buildings, yet the sheer number of stars visible within that restricted area was incredible.</p>
<p>I stayed there, simply being present in the moment.</p>
<p>…for about a minute and then got the fuck out of there ‘cause the streets were damn breezeways for the cold ass ocean wind.</p>
<p>With little effort, I found the alleyway I had holed up in immediately after waking up. I had found cleaner and nicer alleyways during my earlier exploration of the city that I could have used instead of this one, but I held some attachment to this location. Plus, the only things in those alleys were boxes. I couldn’t very well attempt to keep myself warm with a box, so here I was.</p>
<p>Entering, the rushing breeze disappeared, cut off from this small space. The air may still have been nippy, but at least I wasn’t being pelted with cold air every other moment. I shimmied towards my mini fort from earlier, finding it was still mostly intact save one stray new garbage bag that had infiltrated the stronghold. Going to move it out of the way, I discovered the bag’s contents was surprisingly soft and squishy in a comfy way. It wasn’t a pillow or anywhere near as good, but it was better than hard pavement.</p>
<p>After examining the remaining bags, the least offensive ones were collected. I laid down, placing the bags around my curled-up form like a wall. The squishy one went under my head as three got placed on top of my body—a makeshift blanket, that while inferior to any proper blanket, was the best I could do in these dire circumstances.</p>
<p>My bedding arranged, I relaxed into the cold pavement and closed my eyes.<br/><br/></p>
<hr/>
<p><br/>If this was a dream, then I shouldn’t have even needed to sleep, but I can tell you that I definitely needed sleep ‘cause I was now real damn tired. I barely slept a wink.</p>
<p>The combined discomfort of the hard ground and cold air had me yearning for my warm cosy bed back home and kept me from being able to find any comfortable position. Even when I finally found a somewhat pleasant position to lay in, the emotions and thoughts I had swept to the dark recesses of my mind began to bubble up to the surface as soon as my grip on consciousness loosened. I had to stay conscious to keep them subdued.</p>
<p>Plus, every little sound had me flinching and looking around, keeping watchful eyes on my surroundings for my safety. I was constantly aware of the fact that I was a young girl, sleeping outside in an alley in a completely unknown place.</p>
<p>I didn’t get zero sleep, however. I passed out a couple of times from exhaustion which made the transition from conscious to unconscious almost instant, not allowing those buried feelings to resurface before I became fully unconscious. I don’t really know if “passing out” counts as sleep, but at least my brain was allowed to rest for those spans of about 30 minutes that I was out for.</p>
<p>The light of the sun was beginning to penetrate the alley with a soft glow. I sat up, wiping my eyes as my trash blanket fell off and around me. Suddenly curious, I gripped the bottom of my t-shirt between my fingers and brought it up to my nose. A couple of sniffs later and I shrugged.</p>
<p>
  <em>I’ve smelled worse.</em>
</p>
<p>Registering that I was up and moving again, my stomach restarted its yelling contest with a vengeance. The presence of the night and fact that it’s usually when I sleep caused it to go into hibernation, but my stomach was an early riser and awakened with the sun.</p>
<p>I really wanted something to distract me from my intense hunger. I needed to keep my mind off food before I said fuck it and went cannibal. At this time of morning, all I, a homeless penniless child could do, was either go for a stroll or sit and be an onlooker to nature and the activities of others. So sitting it was.</p>
<p>I walked a few blocks from my home base—the newly dubbed Trash Alley—quickly reaching the bay. It was a large harbour, the land curving almost like a crescent moon to create this port town. The town was concentrated in the middle of the curve, while forests surrounded the town. At each tip of the crescent that enclosed the bay was a lighthouse, guiding the ships that ventured into these waters. I had decided then and there that if I got the opportunity, I needed to experience the view from the heads, preferably at dawn or dusk.</p>
<p>Finding a piece of pier that was unoccupied, I sat down and basked in the rising sun’s warm rays as I watched the sailors ready their ships. Many had risen before sunset to load their vessels, some ships already having set sail and become ants on the horizon.</p>
<p>My body tingled as it absorbed the well-missed heat of the day. I could feel life being breathed back into me. My body was still burdened by the lack of sleep and food, but at least being cold was no longer one of my concerns for the day.</p>
<p>Leaning back, using my arms as support, I contemplated. I have been in this place for about 15 hours now. I have experienced hunger, cold and exhaustion. This couldn’t be a dream.</p>
<p>Yet it also couldn’t be reality, because I could understand the words of a foreign language.</p>
<p>If this wasn’t a dream or reality, then what the fuck was it? Thinking further on it will not help me achieve an answer though, so while still highly curious about the final verdict, I pushed this aside to join my panic from yesterday in a deep corner of my brain.</p>
<p>No matter what this is or where I am, I’m hungry. I’m tired. I need shelter. And a job will help me satisfy all my issues. I guess it’s time to go job hunting.</p>
<p>Waiting for the sun to properly rise and the town to awaken, I tried to straighten out my hair somewhat. I’d slept among trash, for god’s sake, and my hair hadn’t seen a brush in over a day, so it was in dire need.</p>
<p>I removed the hair tie from my ponytail and released my brown hair, now hanging down to my shoulder blades. Inserting my fingers into my hair, I massaged my scalp to readjust the resting position of my hair follicles. A tingle ran across my scalp and down my spine from the pleasing sensation. Beginning on the knots, I ran my fingers through the ends of my hair, starting at the very bottom so I hopefully didn’t accidentally create super knots that would be impossible to remove with fingers alone.</p>
<p>I used this time I spent sorting out my hair as a bit of therapy. Being meticulous and concentrated on this single task helped take my mind off the more pressing and concerning issues, allowing me to be more singly present and calm.</p>
<p>Seeing it was about time for people to be opening shop, I ceased my therapy session. I grabbed all my hair save two small locks either side of my face and threw it up into the usual high pony. The everyday routine of doing my hair being a familiar element within this unknown space was another thing that made me able to relax.</p>
<p>I stood up from my position at the pier, dusting off my clothes and attempting to straighten my crumpled t-shirt somewhat. Sleeping in it hadn’t done my outward appearance any favours.</p>
<p>I gathered up my courage before walking off down the streets, in search of any store that had ‘now hiring’ signs out front.</p>
<p>I quickly found one after a short walk down a retail street. It was on the shop front of a quirky little souvenir store with a variety of unique items displayed in their windows. The sign said, ‘No experience necessary, immediate start,’ which is exactly the thing I was looking for. The bell on the door rang as I entered.</p>
<p>“Welcome!” the shop attendant called. I heard some movement further in the shop before quick footsteps resounded. As she rounded the corner, she beamed a cheery smile and asked, “Did you need help with anything today?”</p>
<p>I fidgeted nervously, never having encountered a situation where I was asking for a job before. I’d never applied or even looked for a job, concentrating more on my studies and hobbies while I still could. Being my first time job-hunting in addition to this whole ‘asking for a job in-person’ thing was making my stomach do flips.</p>
<p>“Uh, well,” I began, fiddling with my fingers, “I actually came to inquire about the job availability from your sign out the front.”</p>
<p>Her smile immediately changed from a bright smile to a smaller, curated business smile. She eyed me up and down, her smile diminishing with each inch she observed.</p>
<p>“I am currently in dire need of a job,” I added, wondering if maybe she’d take pity on me and just hire me.</p>
<p>Mouth now set in a line, firm gaze upon me, she held me in place with her expression.</p>
<p>“Do you have any work experience?” she suddenly asked, breaking the silence.</p>
<p>“…No, I don’t.” I felt meek in front of this lady. She held my ability to live within her hand, so I didn’t want to seem unfit for the position, but I couldn’t lie when she looked at me in the eyes with such confidence and knowingness.</p>
<p>“Do you have a home or place of residence?” she continued.</p>
<p>“Uh, no, not really.” My eyes wandered down to the floor. I was a bit too ashamed to look her in the eye. “I was hoping the money from working could help me afford a place. Or that maybe,” I looked back up at her face with a small nervously hopeful smile, “there would be board available. Even at the cost of my paycheck is fine, I just need somewhere I can stay.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry, but there is no board available for this job.”</p>
<p>I immediately deflated.</p>
<p>“And we will not be hiring you.”</p>
<p>My body sagged. All hope in my face gone.</p>
<p>“We cannot risk the possibility of you harming our shop’s image with your unkempt appearance and odour. Having that physical presentation with no way to rectify it and being unfamiliar with the work is too many negative elements to possess for us to consider hiring you. If you manage to obtain a place of residence, then we can speak again if the opening is still there.” Her cheery smile from before returned to her face in a blinding rush. “Have a nice day!” And with that, she turned on her heel and returned to the back of the store where she had sprung from earlier.</p>
<p>I held too many hopes for my first job inquiry. I walked out of the store feeling completely and utterly defeated. Everything she said made perfect sense. Who would want to hire a smelly, crumpled, homeless teen with no work experience?</p>
<p>The negative thoughts swirling about my brain made me want to return to home base and just wallow for a while, surrounded by the trash bags I had become acquainted with.</p>
<p>But I couldn’t. I had to get a job. I was starving, and the only way I could see myself getting food was by working to earn money.</p>
<p>I worked up my courage again, but this time made sure I kept my hopes as low as I could. I’d have to be persistent to be able to find a job in the state I was.</p>
<p>Five shops later and still no luck. They all refused, quoting the same core reasons as that first lady had. My spirits were damp. But I had to keep searching. Changing tack, I decided to go and attempt to find some lower end shops that looked like they were a bit worse for wear and hopefully less picky about employees.</p>
<p>I did eventually find stores matching my mental image and description. None had hiring signs out front, but I decided to go in and ask just in case. As expected, though, I once again returned empty handed.</p>
<p>These shops had quoted some of the same reasons as prior ones, but they also noted they didn’t have the money to be able to hire more people. And so jobless I remained.</p>
<p>All the rejection had me feeling really dejected and worn down. I had to stop and restore some of my energy. I went back to the pier and simply sat for a long while, watching the goings-on of seamen, travellers and locals.</p>
<p>Somewhat recharged, I changed my strategy again, now entering all the shops I found that seemed busy or like they were potentially understaffed. I tried store after store. Street after street. Nothing.</p>
<p>Dusk began to fall again after my third break, bringing an end to my attempts at getting hired. And there I was, the hungriest I had ever been, still homeless, still jobless.</p>
<p>The rejections hurt less now that I had become accustomed to them because of the quantity I’d experienced today. I was more easily able to keep my poker face on and exit with grace, hopefully leaving better impressions upon those later stores.</p>
<p>I returned to Trash Alley, stomach loud enough for a noise complaint. I now also registered how parched my throat had become from the lack of a drink of any sort in over 24 hours, previously too distracted by all the other stimuli to notice.</p>
<p>Trash properly rearranged to match yesterday’s configuration, I laid down and covered myself in garbage bags once more. Tears tried to well up and burst forth as I recalled the events of the day. I’d had to relieve myself in an alley earlier, and it was the most humiliating experience of my life. It made it truly dawn on me how bad my situation was. Even still, I blinked back my tears.</p>
<p>
  <em>I can’t very well be losing more moisture when I don’t know the next time I’ll have a drink.</em>
</p>
<p>I chuckled at that, but it came out strangled, sounding sad and morbid. My small smile fell into a sad grimace as I closed my eyes, my brain attempting to push the thoughts away. Like that, feeling nothing good, I tried to sleep.</p>
<p>Same as the night before, I was unable to properly do so. It was cold, it was uncomfortable, and my brain refused to shut up with the depressing thoughts. Even better, in the darkest hours of the night when not a soul was awake and the weather became its coldest, the rain began. It wasn’t a lot, and it wasn’t for long, but it was far more than enough for a homeless person.</p>
<p>At first, I huddled into a ball and held a bag over my head like an umbrella, attempting to wait out the rain, but my body was getting soaked to the bone. I then abandoned the alley and curled up at a storefront under their awning, shivering.</p>
<p>I watched the rain shower down a metre in front of me, larger drops dripping off the edge of the cover. There were also a few constant streams that flowed off the awning, enticing me with their watery goodness.</p>
<p>Thinking why not, and especially seeing as I didn’t know when the next opportunity for hydration would arise, I took this chance and drank from the flows. It didn’t taste good, having a particular taste of dirt and dust, but it was water, and it quenched my thirst. It also drenched my shirt, there not being a particularly easy way to go about drinking it. The splashing caused from impeding the collected water’s fall made my wet shirt even more so.</p>
<p>Satisfied, I returned to being huddled under the shelter, shivering more violently than ever.</p>
<p>With the appearance of people on the streets in the early hours, I returned to the alley to relax a bit longer. It was hard because of the damp ground and wet rubbish bags, but I still tried to lay down even for a little bit.</p>
<p>Shortly after, the sun rose once more. I didn’t repeat my actions of yesterday morning, too exhausted from the sleep deprivation to manage anything more than laying down right now. The sun rose and rose in the sky, eventually managing to beat down on my damp self that was hidden away in the alley.</p>
<p>I basked in the brief warmth it provided, allowing it to dry my clothing. Once the sun moved further, it could no longer manage to reach the floor of the alley. I took that as my signal to restart my job search.</p>
<p>Like I had finished the day with yesterday, I looked for stores that seemed like they might need more hands on-deck. And just as yesterday, I got rejected. Due to the rain and another day passing without a proper shower, I smelled far more pungent and looked even grottier, so the rejections I received were harsher.</p>
<p>“Young lady!” a voice suddenly called out as I was walking along a street after my 6<sup>th</sup> attempt today.</p>
<p>Assuming it was for someone else, I continued walking, my eyes down on the road ahead.</p>
<p>“Young lady!” the voice called once more. Curious about the situation at hand, I looked up and around in search of the voice in question. I turned around to find an old lady a short distance away, speed walking as fast as her old body would allow towards me.</p>
<p>“I was right, it was you, dear!” she exclaimed as she came closer. I was a bit flabbergasted, unsure why she was approaching me with such vigour and tenacity.</p>
<p>Once she was close enough, she grabbed my shoulders, turning me one way and the other as she looked me all over.</p>
<p>“How did you manage to get yourself in such a state?”</p>
<p>I just stood there frozen, unsure how to respond to this old lady, feeling very overwhelmed thanks to the sleep deprivation.</p>
<p>“Dear? Is something the matter? Are you alright?”</p>
<p>Within my foggy brain, those words rang familiar. I tilted my head, scrunching up my eyebrows as I attempted to rack my brain for why that felt familiar. And then it was as if the fog cleared.</p>
<p>“Oh, you’re from yester- I mean two days ago,” I fumbled out.</p>
<p>Her expression brightened with my recognition. “Yes, yes, that’s right, dear. Are you alright? You don’t look too well, and your clothes are a mess. Did you not manage to make it home?” she asked, clearly worried for me. Her hands began to pat my body around, examining my sad state.</p>
<p>“Ah, ahaha, funny story…” I trailed off, looking away from her eyes, contemplating how to phrase that I was homeless and without a job without burdening her with the information.</p>
<p>“Don’t tell me…” her expression darkened as she paused. “Did you run away from home?”</p>
<p>“Hah! I wish,” I blurted out, not being able to filter my thoughts as well as usual because of my tiredness. I immediately shut my mouth tight, staring directly at my shoes.</p>
<p>“Wait, are you homeless?”</p>
<p>My shoes were looking very interesting today.</p>
<p>“You should have told me earlier, child. Here, follow me.” She grabbed my hand and began to lead me off in the direction she had come from.</p>
<p>Panicked, I dug my feet into the ground, trying to stop her from continuing forward.</p>
<p>“Oh nono, I can’t. I can’t make you do that for me,” I mumbled out, shaking my head furiously.</p>
<p>“You’re not making me do this, I want to do this,” she countered with a harsh look. “You don’t seem like you’d last more than a couple of days after this.”</p>
<p>Attempting to remove my hand from her iron grip to little avail, I weakly muttered, “It’s fine, I’ll figure it out. I can’t let you just take care of me.”</p>
<p>“So, it’s okay if you do something in return?”</p>
<p>I blinked a few times, stopping in my escape attempt.</p>
<p>“Excellent, that seems like a yes to me.”</p>
<p>Still in shock, she proceeded to drag me off presumably towards her house while I stumbled after her, trying to recollect myself and my balance.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. A Smile in the Dirt</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The kind old lady stormed a second-floor apartment, me still in tow. With the door flung open, she yelled into the depths, “Fern! Grab me a blanket and bring it to the kitchen, now! Then a change of clothes and take them to the bathroom.”</p><p>“What have you done now, you old fogey?” came as a response echoing from the small abode’s walls.</p><p>“Just do it,” she called back, nodding to herself, seemingly satisfied enough with the response.</p><p>“Now.” Turning on her heel, she removed her hand from my wrist and proceeded to close the door behind me. “We need to get some food in you, first and foremost.” She circled around to my back and pushed me forwards. I had accepted that there was no way I was getting out of this for now, so resigned myself to her care and no longer resisted her urging.</p><p>She turned me into the first doorway to our left and a quaint kitchen and dining room appeared before me. She guided me over to the dining chair closest to the windows, almost pushing me down into the seat. I was still reeling a bit from the whirlwind that was this old lady and her kindly whims when she suddenly just left me there.</p><p>Being in a house after two nights of sleeping rough felt a bit odd, especially when it was a stranger’s house. I fidgeted nervously in the chair, unsure whether I should just sit there and wait till she returned. I wanted to help out in some way, particularly because of her elderly status, but I didn’t know the location of anything in the house nor what she was intending to grab or do. I looked to my fidgeting feet and shoes that were still on them. I briefly considered removing them but decided against it. If my body smelled the way it did currently, my feet wouldn’t be any better. In fact, they might be worse, and I didn’t intend to subject her to that horror.</p><p>Footsteps approached the kitchen, so I looked up only to be faced with a completely unfamiliar face.</p><p>He paused, staring at me with a blanket in hand.</p><p>“Well I’ll be damned.” Poking his head back out into the hallway, he yelled further in, “Picking up strays are we now, Malru?”</p><p>“No need to be rude, dear.” The old lady Malru came rushing through the doorway, giving the man (presumably Fern) a shove with her hip on the way through.</p><p>She brought the tub of water and cloth she was carrying closer and placed it on the table, motioning me to come closer. I acquiesced to her insisting and approached the steaming tub, feeling the warmth radiate from it.</p><p>“Dip your hands in, dearie. I’ll be back with soap in a sec so you can wash them properly, but for the moment you can wash your face with that cloth.”</p><p>And then she was gone again as quickly as she came. I tentatively dipped a finger in the water, feeling out the temperature and whether I might burn my hands with it, but it seems Malru had achieved the perfect temperature.</p><p>Hands now immersed, a shiver ran down my spine after feeling the warmest I have in days. I wiped my hands together and watched as a definitive dirt tan line appeared at my wrists. I knew I was gross and filthy right now, but I didn’t realise how much muck covered my skin. Apparently it was enough to change the colour of my complexion. I guess sleeping on the ground surrounded by garbage bags would do that to a person.</p><p>Ready to clean elsewhere, I grabbed the cloth, wetting it thoroughly, and then just plastered it on my face. I tried to be somewhat gentle so I didn’t make a mess on their nice clean floor and table—water did splash onto my clothing in the process, but I didn’t care about that. I breathed in the scent of the warm, clean water and just revelled in it for a moment.</p><p>“How’s the water, dear?”</p><p>I smiled behind the cloth, so relieved and happy in this moment.</p><p>“It’s great,” I responded with a sigh. Removing the cloth from my face, I turned to look Malru in the eyes. “Thank you. Really.”</p><p>She smiled back with her lovely and kind old granny smile. “You’re welcome.” Then her smile dropped, and she turned back into her whirlwind self. “But you can thank us later. Right now, you need to finish washing up so we can get you fed, cleaned and rested.” She rushed off into the kitchen to presumably whip some food up for me.</p><p>Realising she got the tub of water so I could clean my hands and face before I ate, I quickly finished up with wiping my face and properly cleaned my hands with the soap she gave me. I dried my hands and face with the small towel she had apparently gotten when she grabbed the soap.</p><p>Immediately, warmth enveloped me as a blanket was draped over my shoulders. I turned to find Fern behind me, a somewhat cheeky smirk on his face.</p><p>“I guess we gotta take care of you now that Malru’s picked you up.”</p><p>Just as Malru had earlier, he guided me down into the seat, now wrapped in the blanket he provided. Before I could help, he grabbed the wash tub, cloth and soap I’d used and took it away to clean.</p><p>Honestly, it was all a bit overwhelming. Malru had been so kind to me and then forced the situation upon Fern, but he didn’t resent me for it. Instead he seemed to be perfectly fine with taking care of me, even if it might only be for the sake of Malru. This old couple was too kind.</p><p>My eyes warmed and my throat began to constrict at how fortunate I was to have met these angels in disguise.</p><p>“Here we go,” Malru announced as she placed a plate of sandwiches in front of me. “Eat as much as you want. I can whip up as many as you like.”</p><p>I tried to blink back the threatening tears and swallow down the catch in my throat so I could respond. “Thank you,” I managed to force out, hoping it didn’t sound too strangled.</p><p>I took a ham sandwich in my hands, inspecting the beautifully crafted sandwich briefly before taking a generous bite. Warmth immediately sprung back to my eyes—the sandwich was delicious. I knew it wasn’t literally the best sandwich I had ever tasted, but it was damn good and may as well have been ambrosia at this point.</p><p>I was so starved that after swallowing the bite, my stomach protested. Being without food for a few days and just digesting itself instead had confused my stomach and made it unable to recognise food as good. I just kept eating though. I didn’t care if it made me have a stomach-ache later, just as long as my hunger stopped and my energy was restored.</p><p>Malru placed a glass on the table and filled it with water while I ate her food heartily. The sight of the clean, fresh, cold water made my salivating mouth suddenly feel bone dry. I placed my half-eaten sandwich down on the plate and gulped down the glass of water with vigour, revelling in the taste of clean water and the partial cleansing of my mouth.</p><p>Concentrating on the feeling of the cold liquid flowing down my oesophagus and into my stomach, I heaved a small sigh. The warmth of the blanket, the smell of the house, the presence of food and drink, along with this familiar sensation were so calming.</p><p>I grabbed my sandwich and took another bite just when Malru decided to speak up.</p><p>“Oh, I don’t think I ever introduced myself. I’m Malru Cade. Feel free to just call me Malru,” she offered from a chair beside me at the table with her signature kind smile gracing her face. Just before she continued, though, it morphed into a smirk. “And that rude old fart from before is my husband Fern. Don’t mind his teasing, he doesn’t mean anything nasty by it.” Her face in this moment was very reminiscent of the smirk Fern made earlier when he gave me the blanket. This couple were really just too cute and sweet.</p><p>Realising I should probably introduce myself I hurried to chew and swallow the food I had in my mouth as fast as possible. After what felt like an age, I had an empty mouth and could finally reciprocate the introduction.</p><p>“It’s lovely to meet you, Malru. My name’s Erin Haynes,” I responded with a pleasant smile on my face.</p><p>“Erin. A beautiful name to match a beautiful girl.”</p><p>I didn’t really believe the compliment, taking it more as a simple pleasantry, but that didn’t stop me from getting a small blossom of warmth in my heart after hearing it.</p><p>We sat in comfortable silence as I finished the assortment of sandwiches she’d served and she enjoyed her own smaller serve. Malru snatched up the empty plates the moment I was done, offering to make more sandwiches but I declined. She’d already piled more than 2 serves worth of sandwiches on the plate originally so I didn’t need any more.</p><p>I stood and stretched my body, enjoying the feeling of a full stomach after days of a whining void. I took one final swig of water before Malru ushered me off towards the bathroom.</p><p>“There should be a towel and a set of clothing for you to change into on the bench. I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable, but you’ll have to make do with my spare underwear for the moment. We can’t have you putting your dirty clothing back on after you just cleaned yourself.”</p><p>I might have been uncomfortable with it at any other time, but right now I just didn’t care. I wanted to get clean and stay clean after my shower. “That’s fine, Malru. I just appreciate being able to have clean underwear to put on.”</p><p>Her concerned face softened at that. “Oh, Erin dear…” She let it hang in the air for a second before regathering herself. “The shampoo’s in the clear bottle and the conditioner in the opaque one. The soap is in the pump bottle on the ground. You can use the silver comb in the top drawer of the vanity for your hair. Call out if you need anything else.”</p><p>Alone in the bathroom, I took the first good look at myself I’d had in days. My hair was an oil slick, bubbles everywhere in the ponytail. The clothing I’d sported for the past few days had smears of dirt in various places. I touched my cheeks, noting the rosiness that usually coloured them was gone, the rest of my typically warmer golden complexion turned a sickly pale colour. My eyes were circled in red and slightly sunken from the lack of sleep, the usually purple underneath of my eyes exacerbated and accentuated.</p><p>To be frank, I looked a right mess. It wasn’t like I didn’t assume I’d appear as such. I knew what to expect, but seeing it stare back at me in the mirror was a different experience.</p><p>As I took in my full body appearance, I noticed the difference in colour between my face and arms. One finger tucked under my shirt sleeve, I lifted to reveal a harsh line of contrast. My exposed arms had been coated with dirt picked up by the winds blowing through the streets and lining the floor of the alleyway I slept in.</p><p>Hitching up the sleeve to my shoulder, I moved my fingers towards the dirt tan line. Fingers placed on the pale section of my shoulder, they swiped down through the partition and smeared lines through the dirt. I examined my fingers, the dirt collected on the underside of the finger pads. I swiped them on my forearm this time, drawing a smiley face within the dirt layer. My cheeks stretched to match the drawing, but it didn’t feel true. While I may be thankful for the kindness of the Cades, and so relieved to be able to satisfy basic human needs, I was just so exhausted. I was who knows where, speaking who knows what language, with no relations or friends anywhere nearby. This place both had to be a dream world but at the same time couldn’t be. Plus, how I got here in the first place was still a massive question mark. My family must be worried sick, probably thinking that I got kidnapped or committed suicide.</p><p>My cheeks gradually sagged, lips settling into a slightly downturned line as my tired eyes bored into their own depths. There’s really no point thinking too hard about it when the answers seem to be impossible to find, but I just want to know, just want to find out why in the hell this is happening to me.</p><p>Hair tie removed, my hair flopped down in a stiff, sad manner. No life in it, just like how my eyes appeared. I found the comb Malru had mentioned, raking it through my oily locks, or at least attempting to. The knots were abundant, so the war was divided into smaller battles against individual knots, repeatedly combing and pulling until they either untangled or ripped out. I honestly didn’t care which they decided to do, as long as my hair was free of them. A good few minutes of combing later, my hair was smoothed and slicked against my head, the pre-shower prep finished.</p><p>Peeling my grimy, sticky clothes from my body, I discarded them in a heap on the floor before stepping into the shower. I turned the taps and the water ran, cold droplets splashing onto my body while I waited for it to warm. The droplets trailed down my body and streaked through the dirt, my gaze transfixed. The most satisfying time to take a shower is when you’re simply filthy, caked in dirt and mud, and you see the stark difference between before and after the shower, so despite my sombre mood, the satisfaction of getting clean still shone through.</p><p>Water satisfactorily warm, I stepped under the stream and watched as the dirt tan lines on my arms washed away to reveal my regular, yet paled, tan lines. 10 minutes of routine washing later, I was clean as a whistle, every nook washed of the garbage and alley grime that had accumulated.</p><p>Hair wrapped in a towel, I towelled down my body when a wave of exhaustion rolled over me. I grabbed onto the bench, steadying myself against it while I rode the light-headedness out. I really had to quickly get dry and dressed before I accidentally passed out or something. The Cades didn’t need to have to take care of me <em>and </em>see my naked body. All at once after the worst of the wave had passed, I hurriedly dried the rest of my body off and slid the provided clothes on.</p><p>Slowly, very slowly, I guided my body down to the floor, sliding against the wall. I sat there for a minute, the cold of the tiles seeping through the clothing and into my body. I’ll be fine after I just relax for a moment.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
“Erin!”</p><p>I startled awake, my eyes cracking open a fraction. Malru was knelt in front of me, one hand on my cheek as her thumb rubbed under my eyes.</p><p>“Oh, thank god. You had me worried there for a moment, sweetie.”</p><p>There wasn’t enough energy in my body to manage to respond, or even open my mouth.</p><p>“If you want to sleep, you should really get in bed first.”</p><p>An arm slid under my own and secured itself around my body.</p><p>“Up you get now. Ready, and…”</p><p>My body was heaved up, high enough that my legs now needed to support me so I didn’t faceplant. They stumbled beneath me like a newborn deer.</p><p>“Come on, just a little until we get to the bedroom.”</p><p>I tripped along beside Malru as she practically carried me to a bed. Then they hit me. Flashbacks to childhood, getting carried from the car to my bed when we left grandma and grandpa’s house too late. To being a young teen, helped to the car so I could properly attend school. My parents, my sweet loving parents helping me.</p><p>For the umpteenth time, tears started to spring forth, filling my ducts and spilling over. I fought them with the measly amount of energy I could muster, but they won out and dripped down my face. It was too late now, they were already out and flowing, so I just let them keep coming.</p><p>We reached the bedroom after an arduous journey, Malru lowering me down onto the bed. Her expression changed for a moment as she likely saw the tears wetting my cheeks, but she chose not to say anything about it. She just tucked me in with her kind smile wrinkling her face.</p><p>“Goodnight Erin.” Malru turned, her smile saddening just before she looked away, and walked out of the room with a flick of the light switch.</p><p>Unrelenting thoughts of my family rushing through my mind, I fell deeper. Deeper into unconsciousness, deeper into the abyss. My pillow dampened beneath me.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
A hint of light, orange through my eyelids. I rolled over, squeezing my eyes shut as I stretched my body. The popping of my joints met my ears, satisfaction rolling through me. My tensed muscles relaxed, and my body instantly melted back into the comfort of the mattress. I did want to open my eyes to inspect the light, but that would take energy I wasn’t willing to muster up right this second. I could look later…<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
I didn’t know how much later it was now, but I urgently had to pee. My bladder had given me the kiss of a prince, true love’s kiss, and awoken me from my spell of eternal slumber just enough to make me find the toilet.</p><p>Practically rolling out of bed, I hefted my body up onto my feet and stumbled out of the room. A steadying hand braced against the wall, I waddled down the hallway to where I was pretty sure the bathroom was. A quick knock to check it was free found no response, and so I fell onto the toilet.</p><p>I might’ve fallen back asleep on the toilet briefly as my ass now hurt more than it should after a relatively quick trip, but I honestly didn’t give a single crap. Washing up, I waddled back down the hallway to the bedroom I was put in and collapsed on the bed. A quick shimmy later and I was back in the warmth of the covers.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
“-uld eat something.”</p><p>Drifting back to the world of the waking, I heard the end of a sentence. I didn’t want to be awake just yet so snuggled back into the doona, smushing it into my face so that just the upper section of my head was visible.</p><p>“Erin dea……really ea……een asleep f……o long sin……u’ve eaten.”</p><p>With my groggy brain and tired, half-covered ears, I couldn’t make out most of what was said, but I did manage to pinpoint ‘eaten’ right at the end. As if on cue, I felt the emptiness in my stomach and hungered for something to fill it.</p><p>I now realised I was encouraged awake by whoever mentioned something about sleep and eating. I deigned to grant them a fractionally parted eyelid so they could see I heard them (somewhat).</p><p>The world was a mess of rough, fuzzy textures, all colours and objects having no defined boundaries as they blended into everything else. One of the textures moved; presumably whoever woke me.</p><p>“Erin, sit up. You need to eat and drink,” the texture blob ordered. It slid a hand under my back and lifted me from my comfort. An involuntary shiver racked my body as the seal holding all the warm air under the sheets and cold air out was broken, cold air rushing to assault my freshly uncovered upper body. A pillow was shoved beneath my back, also cold against my toasty self.</p><p>I was passed a glass, hands placed over my own, likely to make sure I didn’t drop it. The hands guided it to my mouth and lightly chinked it against my teeth, but despite the small attack, I conceded and opened my mouth slightly. Room temperature water trickled into my mouth slowly, gradually hastening as I remembered how to drink.</p><p>After the hands were satisfied with how much I’d drunk, the glass was removed and replaced with a cold spoon—again with the cold things—and a bowl of warm something following close after. The hands now held one of mine against the bowl, supporting the other side so I could eat.</p><p>I cracked my eyes a tad further in hopes of the world clearing, but to no avail. Spoon readied, I went at the bowl and dug straight in. I had no clue what was now on my spoon, if anything at all, but I trusted these hands, kind hands, and just put it in my mouth. The porridge warmed my mouth as I chewed and filled my face with it. Down into my stomach, it warmed my insides as well.</p><p>I was made to sit up for a bit, despite having finished what I was given. To help with digestion, perhaps? A cold eternity later, the pillow was removed, and I was lowered back into bed. I gratefully wriggled back down into my burrow and conked out without a word.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
I kicked the sheets off my body, embracing the cool air that raced to meet my steaming body. The bed was way too warm now and I couldn’t manage to sleep with the doona covering me, but without it I was uncomfortable and too cold. The moment I thought I found a happy middle ground, my body temp spiked up or down, resulting in the ensuing minutes of wrestling the sheets into a crumpled mess that was no more comfortable than when they were neatly tucked.</p><p>My ruckus of groans and sheet-kicking seemed to catch the attention of someone as I noted the door opened in my delirious state.</p><p>“Oh my, you’re awake dear. And… you look dreadful!”</p><p>A hand, cold as ice, touched my forehead before retreating as if burned. Well, I mean, with hands that cold I wouldn’t be surprised if they actually started melting.</p><p>“Jiminy, you’re really burning up!”</p><p>
  <em>I must protest. Right now, I’m really actually quite cold. Hence the doona covering my body.</em>
</p><p>The whirlwind from earlier whipped about and began fussing around, putting a cold wet towel here and wiping my limbs there, seemingly holding a shouting contest with someone. My head was tilted up gently now by those cold hands as a cup made its way to my lips. The hands hadn’t betrayed me yet, so I trusted them to pour the liquid down my throat.</p><p>It wasn’t clear and full like I’d been expecting, but instead more viscous and distinctly sweet. Like medicine.</p><p>Oh, right. I was sick, wasn’t I?</p><p>A second, larger cup met my lips immediately after and the taste was washed away with water like I wanted. Mum really was so nice to be doing this for me.</p><p>Despite the lethargy in my muscles, I managed to mumble out a barely comprehensible thanks.</p><p>The weight in my body seemed to be getting heavier by the second. I couldn’t manage to stay coherent any longer so just let my body sink into mum’s arms. She’d get the message and tuck me in as well. I knew she would.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
After another day or so of sleep and recovery, I felt distinctly better and more clear-headed than I had in a while, though still groggy and congested. Apparently sleeping outside without sufficiently warm clothing, getting rained on, and getting about 4 hours sleep total over 2 consequent nights really wasn’t good for the body.</p><p>Slowly, very slowly, I sat up and stretched. My joints popped in a cacophony of sound. With a satisfied smirk set on my face, I swung my legs off the bed and stood. Too quickly. My head spun and I had to sit back down on the bed before I fell and gave myself a concussion. I tried once more after the spell had passed, concluding breakfast sounded like a decidedly good choice, no matter what the actual time of day was.</p><p>The light of day filtered into the room as I opened the door, its warmth minimal but appreciated. A slow hobble down the hallway toward the source of the light had me find the quaint kitchen from the first day I was brought into this house. Having not really gotten out of bed for a while, the amount of energy it took to travel that small distance drained me near dry. Breakfast could wait for the mo, first I needed to sit down.</p><p>I slid a chair as close as possible to the window and parked my butt unceremoniously on its seat. The sun washed over my body in gentle, heating waves that warmed me to my core and relaxed the tension in my shoulders. I cracked an eye open, unaware of when I had closed them, peering out the window to the street a storey below. People casually milled about the street, entering shops to get their daily necessities and other such products. A few appeared to be walking into the shop below the house I was currently in.</p><p>What had that shop been again? A gift shop? Bakery? Greengrocers? It’d been a few days since I’d seen it, and I’d been delirious for most of that time, so the details hadn’t stuck with me.</p><p>Considering it of no consequence, instead I turned my attention back to the prospect of breakfast. I’d feel bad for raiding the kitchen without asking first, so maybe I should try and find the old couple. Though that would inevitably require more walking… No, I couldn’t in good conscience take their food without asking. I’d have to find them to ask first.</p><p>May as well pee while I’m up.</p><p>It’s a good thing the house was small, as I found the toilet quickly (just in time, really). Knocking on the only unchecked door in the house and receiving no response revealed me to have seemingly been left alone within the house. Which I felt distinctly uncomfortable with. They had left me, a complete stranger, alone within their <em>home</em>.</p><p>My stomach grumbled, but the growing tremble of it silenced it. I felt so awkward and out of place, despite feeling so comfortable and at home not minutes earlier as I basked in the sunshine. They’d come home eventually. I could probably wait until then to eat something. The position of the sun in the sky seemed to show it was about midday, so it likely wouldn’t be unreasonably long before one of the elderly pair finished whatever it was they were doing and returned home.</p><p>Back to the kitchen I went, basically dragging my body along the walls at this point. My brain and body may have woken up, but awake does not mean strong. Riffling through the cabinets a bit found me a glass that I filled with water from the tap. I downed two glasses of it, hoping the sensation of a full stomach could dissuade my hunger from going too berserk.</p><p>A click resounded through the house, making me jump half out of my skin, but I relaxed when a second later the kindly old lady’s face appeared round the corner of the archway. Seeing me, she gasped and rushed over, bringing up semi-hazy feelings of a whirlwind from days ago.</p><p>“You’re up! How are you feeling? What are you doing up? You should be back in bed resting,” she all but shouted into my face. It hurt my ears a little, but I honestly didn’t mind that much right now. Seeing her sweet worrying face and hearing her concerned voice—so very warm—made all kinds of feelings well up within my chest.</p><p>“See, this is what happens when I leave the house for one second,” she huffed with cheeks puffed. “I knew this was gonna happen. That’s always the way it is, isn’t it? Honestly…” Her thoughts trailed off as she looked me in the face and her expression was back to being worried.</p><p>Apparently I was crying again for the second or third time in however many days. Getting kidnapped or getting amnesia or being transported to a different dimension or whatever could do that to a person, I guess.</p><p>I tried to wipe the damned things away, but the hiccupping and tingling in my nose worked against me to keep the taps turned full blast. The more I tried to furiously repress the sobs, the more painful they became. I covered my face with my hands, wishing to just hide and disappear right that second, but warm arms surrounded me and my pathetically built dam walls broke.</p><p>No more were they repressed sobs. Choked whines and gross sniffles echoed throughout the kitchen and dining area as I tried to drain my body dry. Her warmth was too kind. Her touch too gentle. The generosity this woman had shown me was beyond what I could physically handle in that moment, and so I wept. My home wasn’t here, my family wasn’t here, my friends weren’t here, but this stranger was, applying gauze to the gaping wounds left in my heart.</p><p>Sometimes all it takes is a single moment and you know, this person is a gem that I don’t wish to let go of. A gentle soul you can immediately connect with. And with time, they will only become more and more lovely, reveal more and more generosity that they needn’t give yet choose to anyway.</p><p>“I-“ I choked on my words as the constriction of my throat refused to cease, but I had to power through. The hand patting my back wasn’t really helping me either, making me almost burst back into inconsolable tears.</p><p>I loosened the iron grip I had taken of her clothing, attempting to take a step back. The lady seemed reluctant to let go, lingering for a moment with her arms still around my body, but she relented and allowed me a little space.</p><p>“I… I’m sor- sorry. I hadn’t meant-“ Back was I again in her embrace, the action cutting off my words.</p><p>“Don’t you apologise to me. You have done nothing wrong.”</p><p>My body released a jerky sob, the tears still streaming down my cheeks in full force. The force and warmth of her words was like a whack in the face. But I didn’t want to return to full-blown sobbing, so I took a step back once more and smiled a sad smile for her.</p><p>“Thank you.” I’d been saying that a lot in this household.</p><p>The smile she gave me then, all melting sugar and loving kindness, was more of an answer than any words ever could have been. Her hands held my cheeks and wiped away the still flowing tears, eyes never leaving my own. When she let go, I almost felt as if I would fall, her hands having held up my entire world in that single instant.</p><p>“Would you like to stay here with us, Erin?”</p><p>I shouldn’t be shocked. I really shouldn’t. She’s been nothing but caring and accommodating this entire time. She wouldn’t be able to pick up a homeless child and then kick them right back out on the streets. Yet still, the stifled sad laugh that escaped my mouth betrayed my true surprise. Hesitant yet real, a smile spread across my tear dampened face.</p><p>“If you’ll have me…” I hesitated to say what was next on my mind, but I had to. “And I’m really sorry but,” I glanced down to my feet, “I’ve already forgotten your name. I’m not good with names.”</p><p>The cheery laugh that she gave lifted the nervousness right out of my body as I raised my head.</p><p>“It’s Malru, dear.”</p><p>Her smile couldn’t have been brighter.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A new chapter! Yay! Not much happens in it, I'll be completely honest. But I feel it was necessary as set up for some future stuff, and also to give Erin time to grieve after being shoved into a wholly unexpected, sucky situation. Actually, I feel like Erin is gonna be grieving a lot in this story. I hadn't intended for that to happen, but I'm just tryna be real with y'all with how a real person with her personality would react. The pace will still be relatively chill for the next few chapters before the canon shit hits, but some fun prep stuff will be happening before then.</p><p>And can I just say that I bloody love Malru?! Because I do! I know I literally created her, but I feel like she's her own person who just sorta took over and was like 'this is what imma do, kay?' and I said yes ma'am. I love her so much.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. The Resounding Click</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Why am I actually so dumb?</em>
</p><p>I thought I was soooooo smart, being like a calm adult trying to find employment so I could support myself in this weird situation where I’m all alone and who knows how far from home. Apparently, the stress and lack of sleep had affected my brain’s functioning so much that I failed to note its deficiencies.</p><p>I literally didn’t even try to find a way home. Like an idiot.</p><p>Breakfast with Malru was a bit awkward this morning as I was stewing over my own idiocy that had come to me like a vision as I woke. Perhaps it’s because I’d managed to get proper sleep, my stress levels had reduced and my flu had almost disappeared, so my head was cleared and able to properly think for the first time in a few days.</p><p>A call from Malru brought me out of my head and back into the real world.</p><p>“I’ll be heading out to work now, okay sweetie?” she said, her head poking around the archway into the dining area. “Feel free to eat whatever you’d like while we’re gone. I should be back a bit after 4.”</p><p>“Wait, Malru!”</p><p>She stopped her journey towards the door and now fully entered the dining area, her ever kind smile on her face.</p><p>“I, uh, I don’t want to delay you from your work, but would I really quickly be able to ask you a question?”</p><p>“Don’t worry about that. Fern can handle me being a couple of minutes later than expected,” she said with the old couple’s shared cheeky smirk.</p><p>“No no, I’ll try to be quick.” I really didn’t want to make her late for her work, but I had to ask this now so that I could start moving forward.</p><p>“Where in the world are we?”</p><p>Okay, perhaps that was too direct, because now Malru’s face was twisting into an expression of deep concern. I tried to rephrase.</p><p>“Like, what is the name of the town or suburb we’re in? Oh, perhaps the name of the country as well?”</p><p>Her eyes bored into me as she opened her mouth, stopped, and then spoke as she approached the chair where I sat. “Dear, are you alright? Should I take you to the doctor’s? That flu seems to have taxed you more than I realised.”</p><p>I brought my hands up in a sort of defence as I shook my head no.</p><p>“That’s not it, Malru. I’d say this is probably the most together and coherent I’ve been out of all the days you’ve known me.”</p><p>She halted her advances, but her expression continued to twist further into worry.</p><p>“I guess I haven’t really explained myself well, and I should provide you with a little bit of an explanation. I don’t want to take up too much time, so I’ll try to be succinct. Do you remember how the first time we met, I was lying in the centre of the street?”</p><p>Malru’s expression was now more confused than worried as she gave a short nod.</p><p>“Well, see the reason I’m currently homeless and jobless and all that is because I actually just woke up there, in the middle of the road. I was just shopping in my hometown when I suddenly fainted and then woke up here.”</p><p>The emotion in her eyes and face deepened with each word I spoke, but I couldn’t let her interrupt now.</p><p>“And I’ll be honest, I have no idea where this is. I also have no idea how I got here. So, would you be able to tell me, where are we?”</p><p>“Oh, dear,” Malru cooed, closing the distance between us as she placed a gentle hand on my cheek. “I’m so glad I decided to pick you up when I saw you again.”</p><p>And suddenly there was indignant anger on her face as she gripped my face with both her hands.</p><p>“Why didn’t you go and ask anyone for help? Why did you try to refuse my help both times we met?!” she nearly yelled in my face, but she managed to restrain herself at least somewhat.</p><p>I tried to cringe away from her hold and avoid eye contact, but she held firm, directing me to look up into her eyes.</p><p>Reluctantly, I relented to the insistent questions held in her eyes. “Uh, I mean… Well, that first time we met, I didn’t even realise I was lost just yet. I just sorta thought I might have been moved outside by someone for some reason, so I saw no reason to bother you with my problems.”</p><p>A little of the heat receded from her eyes as she leaned closer. “Well there’s no need to worry about bothering me with anything now. Feel free to bother me all you want.”</p><p>I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it a thousand times more: this old lady is just too nice.</p><p>“Now, what about the second time? By then, you’d have to have known something was wrong, yet you still tried to brush me off.”</p><p>I tried to look at her hair so I didn’t have to look at all that love and compassion she held in her eyes as I mumbled my next words. “Well, you were sorta, no, you were definitely, a stranger to me then. No point telling my sob story trying to gain sympathy and help from some random person on the street… I’d just be pestering them for no reason.” In an even smaller voice, I quietly muttered, “It’s not like they’d help me, anyway…”</p><p>Malru sighed, removing her hands from my face and taking a small step back. “It’s not that I don’t get what you’re saying, dear. But you should really ask for help when you’re having a rough time.” With a considering look, she continued, “Why didn’t you at least go to the police to ask for help? Tell them that you’re lost and a possible missing person.”</p><p>I looked down at my hands as I gave some nervous laughter. “Ah, see, the thing is… I sorta, didn’t think about that?”</p><p>I glanced up through my lashes at Malru’s face to see her reaction. While there was some tired endearment and sadness there, all my brain processed in that moment was disappointment. Disappointment in me for being too dumb.</p><p>Immediately I tried to justify myself, desperate to mitigate some of that disappointment she now felt. “I think I was just really stressed and so I hadn’t properly thought out the situation,” I blurted out. My mouth just kept running, trying to come up with an excuse that would erase that look on her face. “I would have definitely eventually gone to the police and asked them for help no doubt if it’d been maybe one more day I definitely would have gone absolutely to ask for help and say I’m lost so they could help me I definitely would ha-“</p><p>Malru cut me off with a shake of her head and a smile. “Dear, I’m not blaming you. I completely understand that you were stressed at the time. I’m more just sad that you had to be put in that situation in the first place.”</p><p>She reached down and squeezed my hands to comfort me, to show me her sincerity.</p><p>“Anyway, it’s not like you can go back and change what you did now. So, it’s time to look forward and think about what you can do going forward,” she soothed, pulling back and placing her hands on her hips.</p><p>I felt my body relax into the chair a bit as she accepted that yeah, it was a bit stupid of me, but she didn’t blame me for that.</p><p>“Yeah, thank you.” I cleared my throat a little, internalising that feeling of acknowledgement without blame or guilt, as I proceeded on my initial tack. “So now that you have the context behind the question, would you be able to fill me in on the specifics of our location? If you have a map as well, that would be greatly appreciated.”</p><p>“Oh, of course.” Malru began to turn this way and that as if looking for something, then paused with a hand on her chin. “I don’t think I have a map, unfortunately, but perhaps this afternoon we could go looking for one if we need to. This port town we’re in is called Dolle Harbour, on the southern coast of the Kukan’yu Kingdom. Does any of that sound familiar to you?” she asked</p><p>I frowned. I wouldn’t claim to know all the countries in the world, not even close, but I had never heard of the ‘Kukan’yu Kingdom.’ And yet…</p><p>“Dolle Harbour sounds very vaguely familiar.”</p><p>I couldn’t place why it felt familiar or where in the world it would be, but the name was ringing some sort of bell deep in my mind.</p><p>Malru’s face brightened, happy to hear I didn’t seem to be hopelessly lost. “That’s great!” she exclaimed. “Perhaps you’re closer to home than you realise.”</p><p>Something was wrong here. I could feel it in my gut. How could I know the name of a random port town in a country I’d never heard of?</p><p>Perhaps more distressing though, was that I was no longer in Australia. Which would require some sort of long-distance transportation. Australia is an island nation so the only way to get to another country is by boat or plane. So, either this was some sort of prank on the level of The Truman Show or I had been drugged and trafficked to a different fucking country. And then outright dumped and bloody forgotten!</p><p>
  <em>No, no time for mental breakdowns right now.</em>
</p><p>I can’t help what has already happened. I’ll wait until this afternoon when we go to the police station so that I can locate exactly where I am. What’s more important than figuring out how I got here is figuring out how I’ll get back home.</p><p>“Perhaps,” I said diplomatically, unsure whether to let Malru in on how wrong that likely was. After a short internal debate, I decided I should probably tell her. “You wouldn’t happen to know of a country called Australia, would you?”</p><p>Her face didn’t light up with recognition, so I knew her answer before she even opened her mouth.</p><p>“No, I don’t. Is that perhaps where you’re from?”</p><p>“Yeah, it is. Considering you don’t know it, I don’t think I’m as close to home as I would like to be,” I relented with a sigh.</p><p>Unwilling to let the mood dip, Malru puffed her chest out and shone a beaming smile my way. “Well, until we can manage to find you a way home, you will be staying in this house.”</p><p>I’m so glad that the person who happened to approach me that first moment here was Malru. Which reminds me…</p><p>I looked up and caught her eye, drawing her attention to me. She just calmly waited, giving me the time I needed to form my words. “I’m not trying to be rude in saying this, Malru, I’m asking out of genuine curiosity.” I fiddled with my fingers as I powered through. “Why are you so invested in helping me? I was a complete stranger to you, yet you practically carried me into your home and basically waited on me, hand and foot.”</p><p>Back was her cheeky smirk, mixed with a bit of a caring smile. “Sometimes you just meet someone and immediately love them. No particular rhyme or reason behind it, you just see them and know that they’ll be wonderful, and you want the absolute best for them.”</p><p>I absolutely knew that feeling. It was the exact way I felt about Malru. But her saying she felt that way about me made my heart melt a little.</p><p>“I, uh, I don’t know if this is weird to say,” I started, a little embarrassed to say this but unable to stop the feeling from manifesting as words. “I really love you, Malru. Really. I know I’ve barely known you for a week, if that, but you’re honestly so sweet and just a lovely soul and I had to let you know.”</p><p>All I could hear after that was her cooing as she wrapped me up in hugs, squishing my face with her hands while covering it in feather light pecks. Her overt affection just filled my body with warmth. She would have probably continued for a while yet if a loud banging hadn’t come from below and made me nearly jump out of my skin.</p><p>She sighed heavily as she pulled me into a big hug, stomping her foot aggressively a couple of times.</p><p>“I get it, I get it. Calm down, I’m coming, okay?” she said with an annoyed yet crestfallen look. I think that was almost a pout now. “I’ve got to go, Fern is calling.”</p><p>Oh, that was Fern? Apparently, they work in the shop downstairs. That’s convenient for them.</p><p>“Like I said before, feel free to eat what you want. There’s some books and a TV in the lounge if you get bored, which’ll be the first door on your left. If you need me for anything, just go down the stairs and into the shop immediately on the right, underneath this house. It’s the bakery that me and Fern run.” With a peck on my cheek, Malru exited the dining area.</p><p>“I’ll join you to the police station this afternoon, okay?” she called as I heard the click of the front door unlocking.</p><p>“Okay Malru, I’ll see you then,” I called back with a smile.</p><p>“I love you, Erin. Have a nice day!”</p><p>And with that final sneak attack, she was gone.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
The trip to the police station had resulted in me filing my own missing persons report. I don’t know if that’s a standard occurrence or whether it’s generally the family submitting the report instead, but it felt distinctly odd to declare myself as missing, despite being knowledgeable of my own presence and location (to a degree). Either way, with that filed I had one lead to potentially get back home.</p><p>On our way home, Malru brought me to a clothing store to pick out some clothes for myself as a surprise. Until that point, I’d been wearing her and Fern’s clothes. I tried to refuse but Malru can be very insistent. I think she may have done it to try and improve my mood after having been to the police. In the end, I came out of the store with 3 new shirts and pants and a promise that I would pay her back. She refused that promise, but I can be stubborn when I want to be. Once I earn some money, she’ll be finding it in her wallet one way or another.</p><p>Finishing off our little trip, we found a small store that was stocking maps. The store clerk looked a little annoyed when we asked if we could unroll one right there, but they allowed us to borrow the front desk to look at it. I think they instinctively knew not to question Malru, even if right now she looked like a simple harmless old lady.</p><p>My first thoughts upon seeing the map: do I have geographical dyslexia or something?</p><p>Based on this map, it’d either have to be that or I’m in a coma. Or this is some backwoods country that is basically cut off from the rest of the world AND isn’t very good at geography. Because it was there. I could see Australia on the map. But it was upside down. And had the name ‘Begerosse Union’ printed over it.</p><p>The more I looked at the map, the more confused I got. Because there was Africa, and I think South America. There was no mistaking those shapes. But they were also oddly placed and tilted. And there’s New Zealand. Good for them. Even if the placement is wrong, at least they’re actually on the map.</p><p>It truly was odd. The strangest thing was, just like earlier when Malru mentioned Dolle Harbour, this map was very vaguely familiar. That shouldn’t be able to be the case. This was just a messed up, bastardised version of the actual world map. This was basically a joke map. Yet Malru proceeded to point to a location on the map like it wasn’t.</p><p>“This is where we currently are, Erin. Good old Dolle Harbour.” Her extended finger was indicating a point on the inverted South America. “Can you see your home country?”</p><p>With a degree of hesitance to the movement, I lifted my hand and indicated to the Australia-shaped country. Malru didn’t show any excitement at this. She also knew something was wrong.</p><p>“This should be where I’m from. It should be… It looks the same as my home country. But it’s not ‘Australia’. And it’s upside down. And none of the rest of this map is right. These should be over here and this over there,” I said as my hands indicated the moving of continents. “This, it isn’t the same map as what I’m used to. It’s like someone took the world map and shook well. It’s not right. None of this is right. But it’s familiar? Not even just the shapes, but this configuration. It’s familiar.”</p><p>Malru placed her hands over mine and gently pried them from either side of my head. I was breathing heavily as I squatted down, attempting to curl in on myself. My eyes were spinning.</p><p>“Just breathe, dear. Deep breaths. Iiiiiiin…” I breathed in. “And slowly out.” My breath shook, practically vibrated as it left my body. I breathed a few more times to calm my spiralling madness.</p><p>In a small shaky voice, my heart’s cries were uttered. “How will I be able to find a way home if I can’t even find home?”</p><p>Malru didn’t say anything, just patted what was intended to be a comforting hand on my back.</p><p>My head snapped up as I got a bright spark moment. “The internet.”</p><p>I stood up all at once and spun to look down at Malru where she was still squatting. “I need a computer. One with an internet connection. Do you know where I might be able to access one? Like maybe a library?”</p><p>She stood to her full height, her face not betraying any of her thoughts as she spoke. “The library should have one, yes. We may have to hurry if you want to look at it now-“</p><p>“Yes please.”</p><p>The worry was bleeding into her expression now.</p><p>“I have to do it now, Malru. I have to, or I won’t be able to sleep.”</p><p>As quickly as it had appeared, the worry on her face disappeared to be replaced by what could only be a fake bravado. “Well, I guess we better get a move on then,” she said with cheer, her smile shining dimmer than before.</p><p>The quick visit to the library revealed no helpful information. A search for the country Australia produced no relevant results. Even an attempt to access familiar websites like Google or YouTube bore no good news. And once again, it was all in this language I had never seen before (or had I seen it before?) yet implicitly understood.</p><p>It wasn’t as if I was catatonic following this disheartening development, but I was definitely deflated and unresponsive. Dinner flew by in an uncomfortable silence-filled whirl. Fern tried to start a conversation a few times but Malru just cut him off with a wave of her hand as I despondently shovelled food into my mouth before excusing myself.</p><p>As I was lying in bed that night, attempting and failing to fall asleep, I could very faintly hear a conversation through the walls of the room. As I tended to do, I eavesdropped on the conversation, trying to use it to cease the racing thoughts and draining emotions so I could fall asleep.</p><p>“I don’t know what she’s going to do... She said none of it was right.” Malru sounded distressed, her voice pitching higher than usual.</p><p>“Perhaps she hit her head and it scrambled her memory.”</p><p>“Fern!” There was no anger in her voice, but the warning was clear.</p><p>There was silence for a moment before he spoke again, uttering quiet words that I couldn’t manage to hear. Their conversation continued, but the distress Malru exhibited earlier no longer distorted her voice, so the conversation returned to muffled murmurs.</p><p>Seeing as I couldn’t hear what they were saying again, I actively tuned out, humming a small song to myself.</p><p>
  <em>I wonder if I could brainwash myself into being okay if I hummed Happy by Pharrell Williams enough times.<br/>
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</em>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
“Please hire me.”</p><p>Malru stood shocked in the kitchen, spoon halting in its stirring motion within the pot she was tending.</p><p>Spending a good portion of the night being unable to fall asleep, I ran through various scenarios in my head, trying to come up with a plan. And the first step of my current plan of attack was basically the same as my original one. Get a job.</p><p>If I truly was awake and not in a coma, I’m probably just in some small country that had their own ideas about how the world looked. Like flat-earthers. So their search engines will only show results that align with their world views, thus why there were no results for Australia. And perhaps the reason I can’t access familiar websites is that this country has some policies like China, blocking Google and YouTube.</p><p>
  <em>Please be the case.</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>(…and yet, I can understand their language…)</p><p>So. If I get enough money, I can travel out of the country, perhaps to what they have marked as Begerosse Union, and see for myself whether it’s home or not, using the internet there to do a proper search.</p><p>This is basically my last option. I don’t know any other way.</p><p>And if that doesn’t work… I don’t know. What else could I do? If my home doesn’t exist, how can I find a way to go home?</p><p>“You want to work, dear?”</p><p>I nodded my head very enthusiastically. “I need something to do. I can’t just sit around doing nothing and let you take care of me.”</p><p>“You really don’t need to worry about such things. We’re happy to care for you, Erin,” Malru started, but I cut her off with a shake of my head.</p><p>“I appreciate that, I truly do. But I need money. It could be my way home.”</p><p>The shock on her face was palpable.</p><p>“Wait, you managed to find a way to get home?” she exclaimed.</p><p>With a shrug of my shoulders, I replied, “Maybe. It’s not for certain. It’s not even necessarily a possibility, but it’s the only thing I could think of.”</p><p>“Well,” she began, hands propped on hips, “let’s go consult the co-owner, shall we?”</p><p>As I was about to respond, she continued. “After breakfast.”</p><p>I may have burned my mouth on the porridge as I scarfed it down my throat, but I was too anxious to know the answer. I had to start working to get money to get a plane ticket to go home.</p><p>“No.”</p><p>
  <em>Excuse me?</em>
</p><p>I don’t know, maybe I’m just a spoiled, entitled child, but I was sure he’d say yes.</p><p>“Fern! Why are you saying no?” Malru looked especially peeved by his response. “We were discussing just a few weeks ago that we may need to hire some younger bodies to do some of the harder work for us, and now one comes knocking.”</p><p>It felt nice having Malru advocating for me, but I really didn’t want to cause an incident between the couple because of me.</p><p>“Malru, it’s alright. You’re already providing so much for me. I can try asking around the town again. Now that I have a place where I’m living, they may be more willing to hire me.” I tried to placate Malru, grabbing her hand and rubbing circles on the back of it. “It’ll be fine. I’ll manage to find something.”</p><p>“She’s only just gotten better.”</p><p>I turned to Fern, mildly surprised. I mean, it’s not like I thought he was heartless, but it still came as a surprise.</p><p>“You saw how bad she was when she was sick.” He turned to me now. “You <em>felt</em> how bad you were when you were sick. Doing the kind of work that’s involved with our job now would just put you back to that state.”</p><p>Okay, very valid.</p><p>“We have to consider the welfare of our staff. And we can’t just hire anyone who asks.” Fern approached me and placed a hand on my shoulder. “You seem like a lovely young lady, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’d be capable of working as a baker.”</p><p>Also very valid. Damn.</p><p>“If you really would like to work for us, though, we could try a trial period.”</p><p>The hope that sparkled in my eyes then must have been blinding as I held eye contact with Fern.</p><p>“If you would be willing to offer me a trial period, then I shall gladly accept,” I replied with a shaky exhale.</p><p>“Geez, you old rascal,” Malru laughed, stepping around me to give Fern a hip check. “I thought I was going to have to divorce you for a second there, ahaha.” Fern just raised an eyebrow to the claim. I personally thought that statement deserved a little more than a single raised brow, but I guess these two knew each other too well to take such a statement seriously.</p><p>With an exasperated but loving sigh, Fern returned his attention to me. “You still need to rest for a few more days, so I guess we can start the trial on Monday.”</p><p>Internally I was doing a couple of fist pumps. This meant I’d be one step closer to home.</p><p>“Well, I’d best get to work now. Go back upstairs and get some good rest, Erin. You want to be at your best for the trial period, right?” Malru said with a wink.<br/>
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</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Fern wasn’t wrong in giving me a trial period. Waking up at 4 or so and starting work around 5 did not agree with my body. Even without doing any work, that alone was draining me. And then the work was only cleaning, some manual labour, and menial tasks, yet I was exhausted by the end of the days I worked. Fortunately, the trial schedule of 3 days a week Fern had decided spaced my working so I had at least one rest day after each working day.</p><p>I refused to give up and let the fatigue take over.</p><p>Mind over matter wasn’t entirely working for me, though. The fatigue was gradually accumulating and by the middle of the third week, it became noticeable in my work as well. And today was the day where it came to a head.</p><p>When there was a lull in customers after the breakfast rush, Malru approached me and asked me to buy groceries before taking the rest of the day off. I could tell that she wanted to just get me to go straight to bed, but she knew that I would fight that. Giving me a task to go and complete before resting would make me more inclined to concede.</p><p>I had gone with Malru a few times to the greengrocers and butchers so I knew the way through the town now, walking on somewhat autopilot. It was a good thing too because my brain was not working at full capacity. Getting lost now wouldn’t have been good.</p><p>Hands full of groceries, I made to start going back home when my vision briefly fazed out. That didn’t seem like a good sign. I looked around the cobblestone streets for a place I could comfortably rest. The food could wait a little longer before getting in the fridge. Myself on the other hand, I don’t know if I could wait for a rest.</p><p>Across the street, I spotted a bench seat situated outside some sort of eatery that was currently closed. Excellent.</p><p>I flopped down on the chair, placing the grocery bags gently on the bench either side of my body. A deep breath in and I relaxed back into the seat. The gentle cool breeze blew over my body, cooling my body that was warmed by the walk to and around the stores. Owning a jacket really was the difference between a breeze and a freezing gust.</p><p>I stared unfocussed into space, tilting my head to see above the rooftops of the buildings. Some distance away I could see a mountain, topped by what looked like a little party hat with my blurred vision. Focussing my eyes let me see what instead had to be a monstrously large pine tree. It was a semi-decent view to sit back and relax to while appreciating the morning breeze.</p><p>My eyes focussed in and out as I stared at the tree standing out from all the rest. Simply enjoying the moment, my thoughts wandered…</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>I stood up so fast I almost jumped and overextended my knees in the process. My feet sped through the streets, fatigue gone and knees still feeling the dull throb of the impact they endured moments earlier. My palms stung with the pressure of my nails digging into them, yet my fingers still gripped tighter around the bags they were holding. Even while my mind was a mess, I was not going to let my perfectly good groceries go to waste. Muscles strained and screamed from the unusual tension they were forced under.</p><p>They were not accustomed to this.</p><p>Eyes spinning but focused, I knew where I was going like it was my one mission in life. My body knew where to go. Where to walk. Where to run. Onlookers probably just assumed I was late to something. How I wish.</p><p>The breeze was gone. I could no longer feel that calming coolness of earlier. The wind was there, but it was no longer the same. It was too cold. I was too hot. While I was sweating furiously, the air flowing past my face didn’t relieve me of this heat as it should. The intense emotions and reactions I was experiencing were so new.</p><p>I wasn’t accustomed to this.</p><p>The running had long since killed my legs. Burning, melting, crumbling. I wanted to stop or slow down, but I couldn’t. I had to get home… I had to get back. I needed that door, those walls, that well-used pillow. I needed to smoother it. The feelings, the screams.</p><p>Each breath was an inhale of fire and knives. No moisture, shredding my throat to pieces. The air in my lungs combusting and heating my body more and more. The knives reached further, past my throat to my lungs. Compounding centrally, they punctured my insides, twisting and stabbing and twisting and stabbing and STABBING AND HURTING AND DYING.</p><p>My lungs weren’t accustomed to this.</p><p>But I couldn’t stop.</p><p>The coughing added fuel to the fire, knives to my throat, stops to my breathing. I felt like I might pass out—I would almost celebrate the occasion—though, as luck would have it, the stairway came in sight. Skipping steps and almost tripping many times, I climbed to the second storey and slammed into the door, furiously fumbling with the knob and my key.</p><p>“OPEN, GODDAMNIT!” I yelled at the door in rage. My newly shredded throat was suffering and made its cries heard when I spoke. “Please, just open!”</p><p>I bent over in a coughing fit induced by the combination of my yelling and butchered throat. Tears moistened my eyes and my throat constricted, the coughs now coming out in choked guttural heaves.</p><p>I needed to be inside, NOW.</p><p>Reaching back up to the doorknob, I tried the lock again with hands steadied by the resolve to avoid making a scene, avoid the embarrassment of having a breakdown in a public area.</p><p>The click of the lock caused a sharp intake of breath from my body that I held and did not let go. I removed the key and opened the door, stumbling in and collapsing. I reached for the door with my foot and pushed, still holding my breath, waiting for that thud of the door against the door frame.</p><p>When it came, rather than an exhale of breath, a wail escaped my lips. Heaving and sobbing, my chest still in pain, my emotions were laid bare on the floor of the entryway.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay, um keep this a secret, but I’m a little bit stupid. Was that first bit of this chapter basically just me commenting on my own dumb brain instead of Erin’s? Yes. Cos as much as I have thought this story out and planned various plot points, I literally forgot to make her properly attempt to find a way home. Like an idiot. I decided to not go back and edit it into like the first chapter when she arrived here, though, cos I could conceivably see this happening for her. Like because she thought she was being so smart by coming up with this plan and trying to find work, she completely failed to consider the most basic solution to the problem of her being lost. So yeah, I’m a dumb, but so is Erin so it’s fine, right? …right?</p><p>And I just have to quickly say, I love Malru. So much. I know I literally made her, but she is her own monster now. Every time she appears in the story, she just takes over and ends up having like 4 times as much time dedicated to her as was originally intended. That first part was intended to be maybe like 500 words. Ended up being about 2000 words. Whoops. But I don’t regret. I’m writing those scenes filled with Malru’s love for myself as much as for Erin. (Also, why am I literally both Malru and Erin? My OCs really are just chunks of me personified.)</p><p>Tl;dr<br/>Me at me: what are you?<br/>Me, with two slices of bread either side of my head: an idiot sandwich</p><p>P.S. I know this is a really long Author’s Note, but I had to add this. A few weeks ago, I had a dream, and it was one of my yearly weird dreams. And Leorio was in it. What was he doing, you ask? Going on an adventure with me? Nope. He was holding a mug with powdered mashed potatoes in it to sprinkle into the ocean so I could get footholds to go through a door. And that’s all. Have fun with that image in your heads now.</p>
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